Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Some thoughts on the Atonement

We were able to have some pretty good lessons last night. One with V, (just him), and one with this younger girl named K. With V, he had a LOT of questions. Questions about the resurrection, the difference between revelation and prophecy, hell, the punishment for sin, the second coming, the priesthood, etc. Our lesson went for about 1 hour 40 minutes or so. My brain hurt after that lesson, because I had to answer most of the questions seeing as Elder M couldn't quite follow the questions. V was using some not typical vocabulary, and Elder M was trying hard to understand. It was a pretty big lesson, and we left him with some scripture to read and pray about. With K, we shared mostly about what we do as missionaries. We shared our reasons for serving, the way we gained our testimonies, some basic differences between us and the rest of the world, and the Book of Mormon. She was actually quite interested, and asked several good, well-thought out questions.
 
For the last couple of days, I've been kind of nervous about leaving Ramona. With my last three companions, I had each of them for one transfer or less each. I mean, I've only been here for 4 1/2 months, (not quite six, Mom.) ;) I would really like to stick with Elder M for another transfer. I've grown to really love the people here in Ramona, especially the members. They've become my friends, and I'll miss them a lot if I get transferred. But, if the Lord calls, I'll answer.
 
Yesterday was actually my last Zone Conference with President C. I'm really going to miss him. The way he talks and teaches reminds me a bit of Dad, really. And Sister C has a few mannerisms that are quite close to Mom's. President C has been a fantastic mission president. Throughout my mission, he has handled problem after problem, and has done so with prayer and fasting. He truly handled the mission the way the Lord would have wanted. I'm sad to see him go, but I'm ready to receive President S. I know he'll be different, but I know that he'll have the same prophetic calling as President C did. I'm really going to miss him.
 
As far as my ear goes, I've been taking the steroid ear drops, and have been noticing a good change in my ear. I can hear a lot better out of it, so I guess the 'roids are killing off the bacterial infection. However, I've noticed a change in my mood. My anger and irritation has been a lot stronger lately, and it started when I started taking the drops, so I'm guessing that the steroids are affecting my mood. But don't worry. I only have to take them for another week, and then I go back to the doctor on Monday. Elder N is going home, so Elder M and I will have Elder W around for a day.
 
Something that I noticed while I was thinking about the atonement. We all know about how Christ suffered the weight of sin and suffering in Gethsemane. We all know about how the pain was so great that He bled from every pore. But I noticed that something we really don't think about. As a perfect Being, He had the capacity to love perfectly. He loved all of us perfectly. In reality, there were two individual pains that He suffered, both incomprehensible to us imperfect people. The first was the pain from paying the price of sin. The other was His own. By seeing and feeling all of the pains, sorrows, sins, and sufferings of His people, He must have felt an inexplicable anguish of soul for all of us. By seeing our errors, our pains, our mistakes, our worries, our sorrows, and our sins, He must have been filled with an extremely personal kind of sorrow, a kind probably not known to hardly any on earth. And our Heavenly Parents and the hosts of heaven must have suffered just as much to watch Him be sacrificed for the world's sake.
 
This week is probably going to be a bit rough for me for some reason or another, but I hope that it'll go okay. I would love to stay in Ramona, but if the Lord says otherwise, I guess I'll go. Thank you for the letters and packages that you've sent to me. They've really done a lot to boost my spirits and enthusiasm.
 
I love you, Mom. I love you, Dad. Thank you both for all that you've taught me, and done for me. I'm proud to be called your son. Let my sisters and only brother know how much I love them, and care for them. Give the nieces and nephew a squeeze and occasional tickle for me. I love you.
 
-Love, Elder Crook

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